Yuffie's Misadventure
by Tincent
Summary: My first ever Yuffie fic and boy does she ever get herself into it. And to think that I'd write a slight Yuffitine is a STRETCH and a half for me lol.YuffXVin,YuffXCloud,YuffX! VinXTif,CidX?BarretX?...its crazy!
1. Default Chapter

A/N's - Just one thing before you guys read this. I was in a **strange mood** the day I wrote this and forgot I'd even writen the thing till I got a notice that one of my writing groups over at msn was getting ready to close. So I got to looking through the site to see if there was anything left to salvage and I stumbled across this one. Let's just say, it's odd. I've never writen a fic **EVER** with Yuffie in it so this was the first one. So please be kind.

Disclaimer- Don't own em', last I've heard ol' Square did and also heard they are making a killing off of it. Lucky ducks

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**_Yuffie's Misadventure_**

"so much for a sleeping forest" the younger one spat sarcastically over her shoulder at the masculine figure, dark garments adorning his form. The deep crimson cloak hiding anything that could have been seen by the naked eye. Her right, the skilled martial artist lashes out with lightning quickness into battle blocking an attack that nearly cost the thin framed ninja dearly. Crying out suddenly, she stumbles back a bit wide eyed "whoa!" she exclaims. "Pay attention!" the woman snaps back at her as the other companion of her party fires a shot bringing the monster quickly to its death.

Once the battle was over, the young woman dropped down to the ground letting her legs spread out against the forest floor. The shapely figure of the older woman comes up, and from the heavy steps, she knew she was about to get lectured to. "What are you doing? You can't take a break now or else we are going to fall farther behind!"

….guh! Fuss fuss is all she's good for now and days…

"Yuffie!" the thump of the steel plated boot making contact with her exposed thigh broke the younger girls concentration. "Hey! You kicked me!" Yuffie spats back bringing the assaulted area up to her slender torso. The heat from the growing bruise nearly brought tears to the youthful face. "why the sudden are you so mean anyways…' she sulks barely saying it aloud for the others to hear. "Oh gods…" a huff of irritation, and the woman turns to the quietly caped man. _Course he's always quiet ,_Yuffie smirked. "Vincent!" she snaps. Hearing his name brought into the argument, Vince shifts his weight as his eyes looked from the one that called him to the one that sat sulking over the petty injury. "We must leave" he spoke with little effect of emotion. Or haste. The blood red eyes looked back up to the dark haired woman standing now with her arms crossed. Without a word, he nods to her and turning, he begins to walk the path leading them from the forest. Taking his cue, the woman drops hands, and trots off catching up to his lead.

"Hey! What about me! Hello? Wounded lady here!" Yuffie snaps, "Vinny! Tifa!" but the two continued on their way. 'well that sure is a fine how do you do if I ever did…' Pulling herself up shortly, she dusts her legs off knocking her palms to the back pockets of her thick tan shorts. A quick huff, she spins back around and charges up the make shift pathway breaking the distance between her and her assigned party. "Come on! Will you two just stop a min…." she huffs and puffs her way till she stops once more bending over to take a quick breather latching her slender fingers against the boney kneecaps. ' oh why me! Why couldn't I get paired with Barret! Least I could out run his fat…" a shrill of a monster brought Yuffie back to reality when her eyes widened as she straightened her body stance.

'what the heck is goin' on here! I haven't seen one of these things since we were back at that stupid pyramid place!' She looked past the creatures shoulder to make out the faint lines of her party members 'gee thanks a lot! Oh no, don't worry, ol' Yuffie can handle herself… no sweat right?' Shaking off a bit of nervousness, Yuffie grasps her pinwheel firmly as she tries to take a quick inventory check on her materia, the monster attacks with it's icy cold breath. Yuffie shudders from the sudden blast of ice forming over the padding of her clothing and exposed legs. "Alright that was a cheap shot!" she snaps with her brows tightly knit, she calls forth fire 2 sending it straight at the purplish toned creature.

Vincent stops suddenly turning back to search the path behind them, Tifa looks a bit puzzled till she turns and spies the battle taking place. " Oh no Yuffie!" she cries out guilt stricken. She charges back across the ground digging her boots into the planet, she ran back to help her young friend in need. Vincent stays silent taking in the present situation before taking action. A moment later he joined the two young women in their fight against the monster.

"This isn't working!" Yuffie snaps as she attempts another fire spell. Tifa resorts to her physical attacks when Vincent warns them suddenly "watch out for her fascination attack, it will confuse your mind" "Oh great" Yuffie huffs a bit and narrows her eyes when she sees the slight tint of blood on the beasts lower lip. "Woo hoo! How did ya like that one? Huh? Not so tough now are ya!" Vince fires off a few rounds but the Jemnezy was much quicker than he suspected easily dodging the spray of bullets. "Oh would you just die already!" Yuffie growls feeling her limit break building inside. Tifa lands one punch, but misses the kick. "that's it, you're goin down!" Yuffie powers up when Vince suddenly snaps "Yuffie don't!" but it was too late.

Soon as the two made contact, Yuffie was thrown backwards several feet away. On impact, the creature burst suddenly spraying a light mist of purple dust into the air. Vincent turns quickly away lifting his cape, he dips under the cloth till the cloud of dust settled. Tifa to turned from the harmful mist covering her hand over her mouth and nose.

"Ah gwad!" the young ninja spats after a few minutes. She sat straddling the ground with both hands on either side of the short black strands of her head shaking out some of the grim and dust that laid heavily on her. Soon as the dust was stirred, she sneezed. Then everything swirled around as she felt light headed. "whoa…" Coming up to her, she could hear foot steps but her vision was so blurred. "Are you al right?" the males voice asked as she lifted her head she froze suddenly.

Tifa strides up to them and stops short when she sees the gaped open mouth of the young warrior seated on the ground. "Oh no Yuffie what's wrong!" she asks bending down to the girls side when she is violently shoved aside and the young woman latches onto either side of the crimson cloak bringing herself up to the heavenly sight that stood before her. Vince quirks both brows up when the girl rationally throws her arms around him holding him tightly in her thin arms. "Oh Vinny I love you! Kiss me! Please Vinny? Will you kiss me? Come on pucker up!" Vince's brows draw down as he tries to unattached the young woman's embrace while Tifa looked dumbfounded at the two for a moment. What the heck….

"Yuffie this isn't you…"Vince starts as the young girl tried desperately to climb him to reach his mouth. "Yuffie, stop" Tifa says as she stands up reaching out towards the love struck teen. "No he's mine!" Yuffie shoots back violently spinning around, she shoves Tifa back. Vince steps around the teen to try and help Tifa back to her feet when the faint clouded mist is stirred once again with Yuffie latching onto his back and holding on for dear life. "Vinny I love you!" the girls declares again. Growling a bit, Vince sucks in a short breath , pauses then violently sneezes.

Tifa starts to stand up when she sees Vince stumble a bit with the young girl latched onto his back, she reaches out for his good arm and asks, "Vincent? Are you okay?" Tilting his head to one side, Vince held his eyes closed tightly. He knew he'd been infected and whomever he saw next he would soon be under the spell. "Don't.." he breathes trying to fight the light headedness. Tifa proceeded despite his warning. "But Vince.." she starts again when his eyes slowly slid open staring at a patch of ground. Tifa smirks dipping over at the waist, she reaches out to place a hand on his shoulder when it's slapped away suddenly by the piggy back rider. Tifa glared at the young nuisance that clung to Vince like a parasite. "Go find Cloud!" the girl snaps. "Would you just get off of Vincent's back.." "No!" "Yuffie!"

Vince groans staggering a bit when Tifa comes up to him lashing out with two strong arms, she steadies him a bit when he involuntarily looks back into her eyes to express his gratitude when immediately he freezes. Tifa, with her hands both holding onto his upper arms looks back into his deep crimson gaze questioningly. "Vin…" Tifa begins to speak his name again when she is quickly silenced with the index of his right hand resting softly against her lips. Her faced burned brightly feeling the seductive movement of the mans touch against her face. "Are you okay…" Tifa mummers softly as her lids felt heavy suddenly. The younger girl slipped from his back but held tightly to his left leg as she sat on the ground muttering her undying devotion to him.

"So beautiful…" he breathes softly against her as Tifa felt his breath against her face. 'oh gods Vincent Valentine is going to kiss me!' Another brush of his hand against her rose-colored face, Tifa fell prisoner to his touch. Leaning gently towards the intended target, Vincent slips the coarse padding of his fingers underneath the young womans chin.

Yuffie screams

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A/N's - Yeah, I know it's weird. Poor Vincent. But least this time it wasn't just Tifa that got to play with our favorite dark haired hunk. Anyways, hope you all liked it 


	2. messed up mayhem

A/N's - I can't help it! I started thinking about what would happen if Yuffie infected all the other members now that Vincent has fallen prey to the Jemnezy's fascination spell. Hehe, so I hope everyone will like this as much as I did in writing it.

Quick Note- I made a few mistakes in the last chapter, namely where Jemnezy was suppose to be. It was in the snow fields remember that? It's been so long ago but now I remember she would show up there, and not the Temple of the Ancients. Anyway, just to clarify. Err and probably some more mistakes to but this isn't really going by the game anyways, just something to write for fun.

Disclaimer - Nope, still do not have any rights to the names , just the idea of putting them into some pretty screwed up situations is all…

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Yuffie screams… 

"Get your grimy over stuffed boobed hands off my man!" she launches herself at the two locked in a lovers embrace bringing her arms around the back of Tifa's neck in attempt to choke the life out of the woman. Alarmed, Tifa stumbles back by the weight of the young ninja's body. Yuffie proceeds to bop Tifa on top of her head with one hand while hold on tightly with the other.

"Ow! Hey! Ouch.. Yuff-ie! Stop it! What in Shiva's name has gotten into you?" Tifa tries desperately to throw off the girl without causing her harm but the ninja wouldn't budge. Suddenly the iron grip of the golden talon of the dark haired gunman found its way around the slender neck. Yuffie stiffens under the forced grip as her limbs dangle helplessly inches from the ground. Tifa stumbles back a bit thanking the planet that she had been freed of the nuisance but cried out in alarm when she takes in the present situation.

"Vincent! Let her go!" Tifa reaches out and grabbing onto his left arm that held the helpless girl in his grip. His eyes locked onto the gapping depths of Yuffie's, he breathes a command to the ninja, "Leave us" Yuffie squirms fighting the restraints but was suddenly dropped . Turning to one side, the teen gasps and fights the air around her to come back into the welcoming wind passage. Tifa shakes her head giving Vincent a hard look before stooping down and placing a attentive hand to the younger woman's back, "Yuffie?" she asks questionably.

Stinging tears almost blinding the young woman's vision, she spins off from her right side bringing a hard elbow down against Tifa's face.

"Don't touch me!" the ninja screeches as she quickly gathers her feet under her. Backing herself up from the two, the dark eyes glare from the woman still knocked down to the ground and back to the man that had assaulted her. Vincent returns the look but without emotion, or remorse. Yuffie scowls back at the man and without a word, she flees from the forest.

Once he felt that she would not interrupt them, Vincent steps across the ground and crouching down beside Tifa which moaned softly.

"Tifa?" his voice so sleek.

"oh… my head…" breathing, " I feel like… I'm going to…" drawing in a sharp breath, Tifa sneezes violently.

"bless you" Vincent murmurs softly as his right hand glides down her back in a soothing gesture. The air felt strange as her vision blurred for a moment.

"Vincent..?" Tifa asks turning quickly as her fearful gaze lock onto the deep crimson pools. And as quickly as the sweet air filled her lungs, she felt frozen. Dear Odin was he simply the finest man she'd ever laid eyes upon. How did the heaven's ever loose such a delicate creature as he? He was…magnificent.

_Breathe Lockheart,…breathe.._

"Vincent?" her voice sounding alienating inside her head

"Yes my love.." he replies with such a silken grace

"Kiss me.." Tifa replies breathing the request with pleading lips

"With pleasure.." Vincent murmurs huskily

* * *

About three fourths of a mile ahead of the scouting troop, Cid Highwind makes himself a comfortable spot by the small stream of water that ran parallel with the winding dirt path coming from the Sleeping forest. Dropping the heavy nap sack full of supplies to the ground, the pilot reaches for his pack of cigarettes and slips a single stem up into his mouth. Balling up the empty package with one hand, he flicks the top back of his favorite lighter and runs the small flame up underside the tip end of his final cigarette.

_Better enjoy this fucking thing, it's my last one dammit_

As Cid savors the taste of the freshly lit cancer stick, he decides it's time to finally shave some of his uneven beard off. Keeping the cigarette tightly knit between his teeth, Cid fumbles around the opening of his bag and brings out a single razor blade and a small square mirror. Just as he is about to stand , he is blind sided by the young ninja.

Stumbling over the pilot, Yuffie regains her posture as she spats back at the bewildered man, "Watch where you're going old man!" Cid grunts landing roughly to his left side, his jaw relaxes as the tip of his cigarette becomes dislodged and drops to the ground. Shaking his head to try and clear the fogginess, Cid's blurred vision locks onto his last prized possession.

"mother fuck!" growling out, Cid jerks his head up to give that sorry no good little pip squeak a piece of his mind and then some but realizes that she was no where to be found.

"Get the fuck back here dammit!" He screams out into the direction that the young warrior had fled. Kicking the dirt, Cid spins around hastily snatching up the razor blade and mirror that laid face down on the ground. His temper fumed as he glared back at the destroyed cigarette. One way or the other, that girl was going to pay him back. If he had to beat it out of her…

Grumbling under his breath, Cid turns his attention back to the task he was previously planned. Looking down at the razor, he curses to himself and runs the length of the blade over the tops of one leg to clean off the excess dirt that accumulated from the recent fall. Turning the mirror over with his other hand, Cid takes in a sharp breathe and sneezes.

"Ahh mother fuck!" Cid swears some more looking around for something to wipe his nose with. With nothing in reach, he slips the back of one arm under the tip of his nose and focuses his attention back to the small mirror.

A long smirk deepens the crease of the pilot's face. Holding the mirror up, Cid turns his chin up as his eyes drank in the reflection looking back at him from the small square. Parting his parched lips, Cid draws them back tightly as he examines his teeth gratifying manner. Shifting his posture, Cid switches the mirror into his other hand holding it at arms length, he examines his reflection again.

Chuckling , he states "Hey there you sexy beast you"

* * *

Yuffie was out of breath, and almost out of strength as she spied the last of the group a few yards ahead. Cloud was in a deep conversation with Barret about something to do with Aeris when Nanaki's ears twitch and hearing the girls rush of footsteps quickly approaching, he was the first to acknowledge her.

"Yuffie, what is it? Did something happen?"

Taking the last few steps weakly, Yuffie gasps for air as she holds tightly with clamped hands against her knees. Cloud and Barret turn their attention back to the girl bent over. Immediately Cloud assumes the worst.

"What is it? Where's Tifa! Is she alright?"

"Whoa , easy Spike. Let her catch her breath"

Yuffie brings up her head as her cold stare pierces the blonde swordsman. "It's all your fault!" she cries out as her tightly knit fist come up to deliver unsuccessful blows against Cloud's chest.

"Hey? What the?… What did I do?" Cloud wrestles a bit with the girl till both her wrists are bound in his strong hands. "Yuffie…"

Barret tries to intervene but is responded with a swift kick to his left kneecap. This sent the massive 350 pounder down to one knee as Yuffie brings one swift knee up between Cloud's unsuspecting legs.

"Oomph.." Cloud drops with both hands gathering his lower region that'd just been assaulted. Yuffie glares down at the spiked blonde pointing her index down into his reddened face. "You were suppose to keep that floozy off my man! Now she's gone off and did I don't know to him and now he hates me! And it's all your fault!" she screams down at him till her face turns a hint of blue.

From behind, Barret grabs Yuffie's arm and spins her around, she almost looses her balance as she lashes out wildly wind milling in front of the huge man.

"What dah' fucks gotten into you girl?"

Taking a cautious step backwards, Nanaki's keen vision watches the light cloud of purple mist bellow up from the young woman's clothing and start to descend to the unsuspecting trio. Dipping his muzzle as far to the ground as possible, the large beast turns quickly and retreats.

Cloud releases heavy coughing as tears welled up in his crisp sea blue eyes. Barret shook the young warrior almost senseless demanding to know what the hell was her problem.

"Let go of me you stoop-id dumb butt!" she thrashes against Barret's hold when she suddenly hears…

"Ah - choo!"

"Gah! Yuck! Now I've got Barret boogers all over me!" Yuffie snaps as the heavy man's grasps releases the young teen. Yuffie looks down at the lightly drenched green mid-drift mortified.

"Aww this is going to take forever to get out! Eww! Yuck!" she brushes her hands frantically against the surface of the shirt when she shoots a look back up at the man who had soiled it. With her brows knitted tightly, and her mouth drawn into a scowl, Yuffie was about to go off on the man but stops suddenly.

Barret was standing before her… smiling. And not just any smile, he was beaming with joy.

"Uhh…"Yuffie manages to get out as one brow shoots upright questioningly.

"You just dah' prettiest thing Miss. Yuffie"

Yuffie's eyes widen in surprise from Barret's statement. "Barret, …. You are scaring me" she confesses taking a step back . Cloud staggers but slowly begins to rise when catches wiff of the damming mist and sneezes. Yuffie continues to back slowly away from Barret as he starts towards her.

"Come here and let Big Bear give you a hug"

"Eww! Now I am officially freaked!" her face scrunching in disgust.

"Where you goin? I'm not gonna hurt you… come to Papa Bear"

Yuffie stumbles backwards loosing her footing over an up rooted tree but lands safely in two strong arms. Looking up, she grunts and is helped to her feet.

"Ugh, thanks Spike.." she replies graciously.

"No problem sweetie"

Yuffie's eyes widen as she quickly scrambles to get a few feet between her and the two men.

"Aww naw! Not you too?"

Barret looks over at Cloud, "Keep your mitts off her Spike if you know what's good for you"

Cloud shoots a look back at Barret, "Or what? You going to shoot me? I'd like to see you try old man"

"Old man?"

"You heard me"

" O L D Man?"

Yuffie watches the two bicker back and forth and slowly she turns and starts for the nearest exit. Planting her feet firmly into the soil, she dashes off into a different direction from which she'd came. Cloud and Barret both look back at the girl getting away.

"Hey! Come back here!" Cloud starts for her

"I don't think so.." Barret charges after her also.

Glancing back over his shoulder in full sprint, "First one to her gets her?"

Barret smirks, "You're on"

* * *

Late into that evening the effects of the Jemnezy's attack were slowly wearing off. Yuffie sat opposite of three angry men all which were glaring back at her.

"What?" she snaps back across the camp fire at them.

Cid draws his spear into his lap as his jaw clenches trying his best to hold his tongue. Sensing the man's distress, Yuffie spats,

"I said I'd buy you a whole stoop-id box of smelly sticks when we get to the next town!"

Cloud looks over at Cid which glances back at the blonde leader. Shaking his head no, Cid grunts and turns his attention out at the night sky. Yuffie pouts farther as she scoots closer to the fire taking the rough bedding from one of the cots of the Highwind to cover up.

"It's not like you guys HAD to burn my clothes!"

"We did.." Cloud states mater of fact "They were contaminated and needed to be destroyed."

"Pfft- whatever you say Spike" Yuffie grumbles under her breathe.

Barret still embarrassed by his actions from earlier kept his attention on the fire. They four sat in silence for several minutes till the soft padding of feet came trotting up from out of the night. All eyes looked back at the large cat like creature as he bowed his head and releasing the different shapes and sizes of limbs from the nearby forest.

"I was starting to wonder where you got to." Cloud smirks wondering if Nanaki knew.

"I thought we would need more firewood for the night." Nanaki responds solemnly.

All eyes settled back to the fire that separated their paths from one another. Yuffie grumbles uncomfortably making verbal comments about how much she hated wool as Cid found his only way of keeping his mind of his addiction was chewing gum. Reaching into his flighter jacket, he unwraps the twentieth piece of juicy chews and pops it into his mouth. Looking up, Nanaki studies all the faces, one by one he thinks to himself till his ears flare in alarm.

"Does anyone know where Tifa and Vincent are?"

Cloud, Barret and Cid all look at each other as they try and remember when they last spoke with the two. Then Cloud looks over at Yuffie,

"You were with Tifa and Vincent last, where are they?"

Blinking, Yuffie stops in mid-rant to herself about the dumb blanket and blinks. Cloud asks her again seeing that the first time the question didn't register with her.

"Tifa and Vincent?"

Blinking, Yuffie's brows furrow a bit but her complexion soon softens when she recollects the last encounter with the two.

"Oh…" she looks sheepishly back at the four inquisitive stares, and gulps "heh.. Funny thing you should ask that.." she starts and dips her head quickly so her line of vision locked down on her socked footing.

"Yuffie..?" Cloud's brows begin to raise as she looks back up at him

With a light uneasy laugh, Yuffie shrugs, gulps and replies, "Ooopsies"

* * *

Moaning slightly, Tifa's left leg begs for relief from its current position as she starts to move the tense muscles her senses become suddenly aware of the present situation. Dark cherry brown eyes quickly snap open as she wills her left hand to feel around the warm naked chest.

_Oh gods…_

Lifting her head slowly, Tifa turns her eyes down looking at the sleeping form resting peacefully beside her.

_…we didn't…we couldn't have,…could we? _

With her breath caught in her throat, Tifa slowly reaches for the dark crimson cloak that covered most of their bodies. Lifting the material away from their bodies, Tifa's eye bulge at the sudden awareness of what had taken place between them. Crying out, Tifa takes the cloak with her as she turns away from the gunman and fighting with the fabric, she hides her nakedness from any prying eyes.

Vincent stirred suddenly when he hears the distressed cry from the martial artists as his eyes come into focus, he soon realizes the present state that he is in. Sitting up, he quickly snatches his carelessly discarded shirt to cover his lower region. Tifa watches him as she clamps a shaking hand over her mouth.

_..we…we oh gods…we did… we… oh gods help me!_

Pulling up, Vincent stands with one hand holding the fabric firmly in place, as his free hand tries to slip back the unruly bed-headed raven locks. The once solace complexion now shattered, he looked back with as much of a bewildered look at the young woman wrapped in his cloak as she was at him.

A curt nod, he breathes glancing in her direction ".. Tifa"

Swallowing the massive lump, she fumbles under the mans cloak. Fighting to control her thundering heartbeat, Tifa acknowledges him with an unsteady reply…

"..Vincent"

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FiN- Okay it wasn't as funny as it should have turned out to be but in my head it was a lot funnier. Er, sorry if I offended anyone. This was wrote out of sheer bordom so I admit it's a bit rough, but I had fun with the idea. Maybe some day I'll try and write a better version...er a more comical version perhaps. Anyways, thanks for taking time out to read this. And thanks for the two reviews for my first post to this one. 


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